Blackout- It’s what i experienced after being overwhelmed in pain listening to this album. Britney seems to have exhausted her past image of innocent and virgin and capitalises on her image as a freakshow.

Spokesperson Teresa LaBarbera from her record company claims: “She was very involved in the songs and how they turned out. It’s her magic that turns these songs into what they are”. If thats true, no wonder the songs suck dong.
The only magic i’d expect from her is to sit on the studio couch in a legspread with a bottle of vodka and hair clippers while Pharrel, Danja and Timbaland work the soundboards. And What the fuck is with the drenching of voice modulation? I wouldn’t have been suprised if they took a microphone to britneys mouth while she was passed out and just processed her various drunken slurs and dribbles into lyrics.
Even if she was sober, I wouldn’t listen to anything that came from the mouth of the person who stated: ” Honestly, I think we should just trust our president in every decision he makes and should just support that, you know, and be faithful in what happens”. … smart girl.

“Gimme more … drugs.”

The whole album generally gives off a kind of dirty vibe with it’s seedy synths and britney’s ridiculous voice mods which in parts of Gimme More and Heaven on Earth, is actually reminiscent of decent house music. But every 15 seconds, you’ll just be hit with a pang of awkwardness after you hear something like the chorus of ‘Radar’, or producer Danja’s ‘tough guy’ lines:

Ha, you gonna have to remove me
Cause I ain’t goin’ no where , hehe

It’s just incredibly lame, and he fails miserably at being a hard-ass, aswell as life.
Originality is a key winner in this album. The song ‘Hot as Ice’ epitomises originality in the lines:

I’m cold as fire baby, hot as ice
If you’ve ever been to heaven, this is twice as nice

A scientist furiously trying to decipher the paradox of being “cold as fire and hot as ice”.

Pop artists along the lines of Kylie Minogue, Beyonce and Nelly Furtado occasionally sing about promiscuity. Coupled with a hot, seductive singer, it’s pretty damn appealing.
Unfortunately, if your trainwreck, drug-monkey and balding next door neighbour who’s had custody of her kids removed started singing with lines like “My body is calling out for you bad boy”, its bound to make your boner die faster than vanilla ice’s career.

“My body’s calling out for you bad boy.”

When the album was near completion, I can only assume the producers got together and thought, ” How can we ruin a song on this album, Even more?”.
“I Know”! exclaims the other producer in glee. ” Lets record a turkey gobbling, and sample it into ‘Piece of Me’!”
Wow. Turkey noises and pop music. I can’t think of anything that goes more hand-in-hand.
The last track of the album “Why Should I Be Sad”, sparks a very obvious answer. You should be sad bitch, cause your albums a piece of shit.
If you’re into turkey’s gobbling, promiscuously seedy next door neighbours and hard-ass, life-failing producers, then Britney Spear’s Blackout will really strike a chord in your twisted heart.